Learning to let go, pictures of my bedroom & other various thoughts

This past week I've had a lot on my mind. I've been struggling for quite some time on whether or not to keep this blog, feeling unsatisified about its layout & design, the feeling of "commitment" & being insecure when easily comparing myself to other bloggers. Not just this, but Instagram & even Facebook as well.

Sometimes I don't feel like myself, I feel like I need to impress or reflect a part of my life in a particular light. Feeling discontment with the things I have & the things I don't have. Not being satisfied with my home, my personal sense of style, etc. 

The reason I feel this way is because I know it's not me. In a way it's dragged me into a materialistic world that i just can't stand. Before all this, I was a very simple girl. I was never on my phone. I went to work, spent all of my free time with my husband, best friend, and my family. I went to the gym every night, target to de-stress & trader joes for my groceries. On Friday & Saturday nights we would get gussied up, put our cowgirl boots on & head out to go dance the night away. Oh how I miss home sometimes! Then do it all over again the following week! I was so in love with living in the moment that more than 99% of the time my phone was lost somewhere in my house or left at home because I didn't need it. 

Currently I have more "free time"  and I'm grateful for it. It's such a learning experience for me. I just have been using my free time in ways that I don't like. I've been working on adjusting my schedule that doesn't make me feel like I am tied to this blog, or keeping up with everyone's instagram pictures. I'm not going to give up on this blog just yet, but I want to make sure that what I post is what I truly believe & value. That I don't need to feel obligated to post something everyday or share every part of my life on here. I want this to be a place that is a positive outlet for me, a relfection of my thoughts & ideas that I am confidently willing to share with those that like to follow along!
For lent I gave up social media in hopes of being able to refocus my thoughts on Jesus & all the abundance that he provides in my life, but also to get back to the JORDAN I was, not the Jordan I feel I need to be in order to live up to other bloggers popular statuses.

I've been hesitant about sharing parts of my home, because honestly some parts don't feel like me. There's spaces that are decorated with items that were trendy, or impulse buys. Except one room. That room is my bedroom. It's not yet done, but it's filled with love & an honest relfection of my interior taste regardless of what anyone thinks. It's where I wake up in the morning & where I rest my head for the night, it's where I feel the most cozy & at home. Why? Because it's all a part of me!

I've recently read the best advice ever when it comes to making a house homey..which is what I'm all about.

" decor usually gets too much attention at the expense of other influences, but it certainly matters. It is best to know & follow your own real taste confidently instead of worrying about impressions and image. As a general rule, anything you really like works- old, new, traditional, avant-garde. A room that looks lived in looks more homey. " - Home Comforts

Gah! Reading this made me want to delete Pinterest & just live my life! Live life in my home! The way I want too! I think I might just get rid of that pesky, time stealing Pinterest!!

Then I read one of my devotionals & it just hit home!

" the way I spend my money shapes me. What the money does to me is very important. It crafts my spirit. It sculpts me. The way I spend my money shapes the look on my face, my lips, my whole expression, my soul, my spirit. When I return to the lord, it makes my spirit richer and my face kinder.

I'm letting go of feeling like I need to impress others through my sense of style, my devotation to Jesus or what food I put on the table. I'm a simple woman, who has always loved a simple life. A life that I want to get back to! A life that I would love to share! So my promise to myself as I write this is: all I am willing to share will be a relfection of what truly brings pure joy to my life, what I share will not be portrayed in a way that I am just trying to impress, but simply share the joy I have about something with others. If I feel like writing a novel I will write a novel post simply because my heart wants an outlet to place my thoughts & feelings. I want to inspire other women, I want to be friends with other women, I want to share my ideas, my adventures with others, but not in a false light. 

One of my favorite pieces! Who doesn't love Sweet Home Alabama?! I purchased this from a shop off     etsy! Message me if you would like the link :)

Leftover flowers from my Valentine's Day bouquet. 

Soft floral cotton sheets are my favorite. I don't like dark colored sheets. For some reason it makes me feel dirty! These sheets are from the shabby chic collection from Target. My husband loves them too because he says it reminds him of country livin! 
Oh & Loving my new Jesus + Coffee mug purchased here: link
(Yep it's dirty! Real life!) 
That pretty jewelry box was my Valentine's Day gift this year! 

For awhile I had this fancy, pretty, ruffled, expensive comforter on our bed. Guess what? I took it off.
I'm a quilt woman. I love quilts always have always will, and my room is 100x more cozy with this quilt that was handed down to me from my mother - in- law. It's perfect in every single way. 

Yes that's my puppy. Mis behaving & on my bed. Bad parenting? Yeah some would say so. Do I need to be more stern with keeping him off the bed? Probably. Is he the best cuddler & snuggler in the world? You betcha! 

Here's to a new season. An honest season. A real season!